Donald Trump Demands to Join the Avengers: “I’m Already a Disney Star, Believe Me”

In what some are calling the most unexpected crossover since Avengers: Endgame, President-elect Donald Trump has reportedly reached out to Disney executives with a formal request to become an official Avenger. His reasoning? “I’m already in the Disney family. Home Alone 2 is a Disney+ classic. It’s time to bring Trump into the MCU.”

From Plaza Hotel to Stark Tower

Trump’s role in Home Alone 2: Lost in New York is a brief but memorable cameo, where he directs young Kevin McCallister to the Plaza Hotel lobby. “It’s iconic, folks,” Trump said during a recent rally. “No one tells directions better than me. Kevin got where he needed to go, and now it’s time for me to do the same.”

In his pitch to Disney, Trump proposed several ways his character—self-named “The Don”—could join the Marvel Cinematic Universe:

• A Shield of Gold
  Trump envisions wielding a “big, beautiful shield” plated in gold, embossed with the words Make America Super Again. “It’s like Captain America’s shield, but classier. And mine will be the best shield ever, believe me.”
• A Towering Base
  As The Don, Trump would operate out of his very own Trump Tower in Avengers HQ, complete with a gold-plated helipad, a private golf course, and a Space Force recruitment center. “Stark had a tower, right? My tower’s bigger.”
• Superpower: Deal-Making
  “Why fight the villains when you can negotiate?” Trump suggested. “Thanos? Overrated. I’d have closed a deal with him before he even got the Infinity Gauntlet.”

Disney Responds (Sort of)

Insiders at Disney have confirmed they received Trump’s proposal, though the response has been less than enthusiastic. One anonymous executive reportedly quipped, “We’re still trying to figure out how to explain the Eternals. Let’s not make things harder.”

Kevin Feige, president of Marvel Studios, issued a diplomatic statement: “While we respect President Trump’s passion for the Marvel Cinematic Universe, we believe the Avengers roster is currently complete. But hey, there’s always What If…?”

Fan Reactions

The news has sent shockwaves through the Marvel fandom. On Twitter, hashtags like #TrumpAvenger and #NotMyMCU began trending almost immediately. One fan wrote, “If Trump joins the Avengers, I’m switching to DC.”

Others, however, were more supportive. “Why not?” said one Trump supporter. “He’s already fighting deep state Illuminati agents. This just makes it official.”

Even Chris Evans, who played Captain America, couldn’t resist chiming in. “Pretty sure Cap wouldn’t approve,” he tweeted, followed by a gif of Steve Rogers rolling his eyes.

Proposed Avengers Storyline

According to sources close to Trump, he’s already envisioning his first Marvel movie: Avengers: MAGA Assemble. The plot would reportedly involve The Don saving the multiverse from “fake news aliens” and “corrupt deep-space elites.” Along the way, he would forge an alliance with Rocket Raccoon, whom Trump described as “a little guy with a lot of heart, just like me.”

The climax would feature a showdown between The Don and a CGI-enhanced Hillary Clinton, portrayed as an alien Skrull. “We’ll win bigly,” Trump promised. “Bigger than any box office ever.”

Merchandising Mayhem

Trump has also proposed an extensive line of Avengers merchandise featuring his likeness, including:

• The Don action figures that recite his most famous lines (“You’re fired!”).
• A limited-edition golden Infinity Gauntlet, marketed as “the ultimate negotiation tool.”
• MAGA-branded capes, because, as Trump put it, “Every hero needs a cape, folks.”

The Future of the MCU?

While Disney remains tight-lipped about Trump’s proposal, the entertainment world can’t stop buzzing about the possibilities. Could The Don become the next big thing in the MCU, or will this idea join the ranks of Howard the Duck as a footnote in Marvel history?

As for Trump, he remains optimistic. “People doubted me when I said I’d be president. They doubted me when I started Space Force. And now, they’re doubting me about this. But just wait, folks. Soon, I’ll be saving the universe. And when I do, the critics will say it’s the greatest superhero performance of all time. Believe me.”