Study Shows 78% of Americans Trust the Domino’s Pizza Tracker More Than Their Employer

CHICAGO, IL — A new study from the Institute for Modern Labor Psychology has found that 78% of American workers trust the Domino’s Pizza Tracker™ more than they trust their direct supervisor, manager, or HR department.

The study, titled “Sauce, Transparency, and Accountability in a Collapsing Economy,” surveyed over 10,000 employees across various industries. The results were clear: if it’s between believing Karen from HR or a glowing red bar that says “Quality Check,” most Americans will take the cheese-stained UI every time.

“When the Tracker says my pizza is in the oven, I believe it,” said DeMarcus Hill, 34, a warehouse worker in Ohio. “When my boss says, ‘We’ll look into your request for time off,’ I assume it’s going in a folder labeled LOL.”

Researchers noted that the pizza tracker’s appeal comes from its clear communication, real-time updates, and complete lack of passive-aggressive emails.

“There’s no corporate jargon,” explained Dr. Lynn Gavaskar, lead author of the study. “Domino’s doesn’t say things like, ‘Your pizza is currently synergizing its journey toward your growth objectives.’ It just says ‘Being made by Josh.’ That kind of honesty is extinct in corporate America.”

The study also found that Domino’s Tracker scored higher than employers in several key categories, including:

• Accountability: The Tracker actually tells you when your pizza is late. Your manager tells you the spreadsheet “fell off the radar.”
• Responsiveness: Domino’s will call you if there’s an issue. Your employer sends you a survey three months after your breakdown.
• Recognition: Domino’s lists the name of the person making your pizza. Most workers get labeled as “resource #A731C.”
• Closure: Domino’s says “Delivered.” Your job says “We’ll circle back,” and never does.

Corporate executives were quick to downplay the results.

“Our employees know they can always come to us,” said Barry Culliver, VP of Culture Engagement at a mid-sized tech firm. “We have an anonymous suggestion box, a Slack channel no one monitors, and a wellness goat that visits quarterly.”

Despite that, many employees expressed longing for a pizza-like system at work.

“Imagine if you could track your promotion request,” said Olivia Chen, a 29-year-old marketing analyst. “Like, ‘Manager is reviewing your accomplishments. Manager has left for the weekend. Manager has forwarded your email to someone who no longer works here.’ That would be so helpful.”

Domino’s, for its part, has responded to the study by launching a limited-time marketing campaign:
“Domino’s: We Won’t Give You a Raise, But At Least You Know Where Your Damn Pizza Is.”

At press time, a parallel study showed that 62% of Americans trust the Waffle House night shift more than their elected officials.